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What Questions Should You Ask The Officiant?


I've been a wedding officiant since 2004. I've performed hundreds of weddings – and I've met with nearly as many engaged couples to discuss ceremony details. I say "nearly" because not all couples find it necessary to meet me before the big day. For me, that's OK . . . I've been doing this long enough to know what to expect. But I strongly suggest that couples at least meet for coffee to make certain their wedding officiant is a good fit on the personality front. Plus, it will put your mind at ease knowing you've met face to face with your most-important wedding vendor.

I've taken over for several officiants who didn't meet a couple's expectations. From personality conflicts to last-minute cancellations, I've helped couples deal with the stress of changing plans mid-stream.

I usually have a few talking points I like to highlight for the couple and then open it up to them for questions.

  • Here are the things you should ask your potential officiant:

  • How long have you been performing weddings?

  • What happens if you can't make our wedding due to unforeseen circumstances?

  • What time will you be at the ceremony venue the day of the event?

  • Do you perform rehearsals? If so, how does that work?

  • Will you coordinate with other vendors?

  • What should we expect in terms of the service? (length, tone, etc.?)

  • Can we write our own vows?

  • What do you suggest to help us create a memorable ceremony?

  • What about the paperwork?

  • What are your fees and what all do they include?

The most important thing you should think about when choosing an officiant is how comfortable you are with her/him. You are going to be a little stressed and a little overwhelmed on the day of your wedding. You want someone there who can get things done and keep the waters calm.

Here's to hoping your wedding day is magical and memorable for all the right reasons.

Peace and Joy,

Rev. Traci

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